Marvyn and Mary » Miscellaneous

Jagger Chatting Away

Mary — Fri, 19 Jun 2009 01:41:33 +0000

I recently recorded Jagger “talking” away. He loves to talk!

My Uniquely Odd Approach

Marvyn — Wed, 17 Jun 2009 05:12:55 +0000

I’ve been hitting up Craiglist for new projects. I’ve veered away from submitting formal intro emails and have tried to respond uniquely. One company wanted somebody with a sense of humor, so I responded with this email:

A construction worker on the 4th floor of an unfinished building was too lazy to get a handsaw on the ground level. So he whistled down to a fellow worker on the ground to get it for him. Being 4 levels up, the lazy construction worker couldn’t be heard, so he started making signals.

First he pointed to his eyes (meaning “I”). Then pointed to his knees (meaning “need”) and then began moving his hand back and forth mimicking the motions of a hand saw.

Finally the guy on the ground starting nodding his head as if he understood and dropped his pants and started to masturbate. The guy on the 4th floor turned beet red and ran down to yell at his fellow worker, “You idiot! I was trying to tell you I needed a hand saw”.

The other guy replied, “I know, I was trying to tell you I was coming.”

Just Another Summer Weekend

Marvyn — Mon, 08 Jun 2009 05:01:29 +0000

Jagger’s 1st Time in a High Chair

Jagger’s first time sitting in a high chair, courtesy of Banana. No surprise that the safety belt is sized properly for Jagger considering they’re only 5-6lbs apart. Poor Banana, I hope she’s eating well out in GA with her daddy.

Aunt Frances Thank You to The Chu BBQ

I thought we had a BBQ for the Chu last weekend? Well, good food doesn’t hurt anybody.

The Priest’s Graduation Party

Mary wrote Mikey a check, but isn’t that against the whole priest mantra? Can I consider it this Sunday’s tithings to God?

Do I Watch It?

Marvyn — Fri, 05 Jun 2009 05:37:11 +0000

My cousin John has been raving about this movie “The Story of Us”, starring Bruce Willis and Michelle Pfeiffer. He even went so far to text me that it was showing on the Women’s Entertainment channel a few weeks ago. Just last week he left his DVD copy with me as an attempt to force it down my throat.

So now I’m looking at the box art and it says, “The most wonderful and romantic movie of the year!” I’m sorry, but I don’t watch chick flicks unless Mary already has it playing. I enjoy Bruce Willis movies, but I like the the badass-Yippee-ki-yay-they-call-me-mister-goodkat-I-am-Korben-Dallas Bruce Willis, not the apron-wearing-10-yards-Ben-Affleck-take-care-of-my-daughter Bruce Willis.

I’ll pass on this and just continue watching replays of the Lakers’ game 1 victory over the Magic on ESPN.

Cupid is Pissed

Marvyn — Thu, 04 Jun 2009 16:24:21 +0000

Dear Liz,

How dare you slap love in the face! I have been practicing my ring bearer duties and now you pull this crap. You think you have it hard!? I have to carry your stupid rings down the aisle…I haven’t figured out how to walk yet! But when I do, I’ve got a bat with your name on it. Protect your shins. It’s on!

DIAF,
Jagger

Ghosts of Girlfriend’s Past (Marvyn Edition)

Marvyn — Tue, 12 May 2009 07:39:54 +0000

I recently had one of the worst dreams in my life. To summarize my dream, I had cheated on my wife and she left me along with Jagger. Which eventually became a long legal battle for custody. In my dream, I would stand in Jagger’s empty nursery room missing his little coo’s and grunts. When I woke up from my dream I let out a sigh relief seeing Jagger and Mary next to me in bed. Whew!

First Summer-Like Weather of the Season

Marvyn — Sat, 25 Apr 2009 20:43:07 +0000

Bikers coming out in groups, girls in bikinis, sand in the car, smell of coconut oil, traffic heading south to the beach…Remind me next year that 85° inland means like 60° at the shore and breezy.

Kitchen Appliances and Man

Marvyn — Thu, 23 Apr 2009 06:43:38 +0000

My wonderful wife bought me Jeno’s Pizza, a favorite of mine. (Such a great wife) Set the toaster oven to 12 minutes. 12 Minutes later…cold pizza. Are the knobs broken I wondered. Twist them around, jiggle them, fix a broken connection. Another 12 minutes. WTF?! Oh wait, somebody unplugged the toaster. Ugh.

Give Me That Fish!

Marvyn — Sat, 21 Mar 2009 05:30:16 +0000

The song from McDonald’s Filet O’ Fish is so catchy that I even have it as a ringtone. But I was actually surprised that it’s engrained in more peoples’s head than mine. A few days ago Mary’s mom started singing it to me. SHOCKING. And today Mary and her Facebook buddies were talking about it. I call it marketing at its best.

And in case you’ve been living under a rock, here it is in fully glory.

My Favorite Christmas Movies

Marvyn — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 06:44:03 +0000

My favorite movies to get into the holiday season.

Jingle All The Way

Sinbad? Check. Ahnuld? Check. This movie is so bad, it’s good. Definitely not on par with Last Action Hero or True Lies, but when you’re blazed on eggnog, it doesn’t matter.

Gremlins

This isn’t your traditional Christmas movie, but when you receive a mogwai as a gift, you better follow any instructions that come along with it. Plus this one actually hit’s a little close to home. Mary is friends with a Gremlin.

Die Hard

Yippee Kay Yay

National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation

You know every street has that guy.

Christmas Story

It doesn’t feel like Christmas unless I see this movie at least once during TNT’s all day marathon. If you haven’t seen this movie buy now, go out and purchase the DVD now.

“It is a lamp you nincompoop, but it’s a major award!”…classic.